Coming+of+Age+Essay+Marissa

My Journey There is a time when a person realizes that he/she is no longer a child. Whether it is a gradual journey or a tragedy that speeds up the process, a person will eventually learn the difference between a man and a boy or a woman and a girl. I became a lot closer to becoming a woman when my mother passed away of breast cancer two years ago. I know that many people may not consider me as a woman, but I have had a taste of what it’s like to experience reality. My mom, Lynne Chow, was a golf sales representative. She was a strong, independent, hard working woman. At one point in career she worked for over a dozen different companies. My mom had an aura around her that drew people towards her. She had chocolate brown hair with bangs and a slight bob haircut. Her smile lightened up any room and she had a heart of gold. Like many jobs, women sales representatives were not the norm. My mom visited the stores twice as often, and her meetings with the buyers lasted twice as long. Buyers kept her late because before they approved the orders, they inspected her work three times. They thought she might try to swindle them out of their money. My mom sold everything from cups, to clothes, and watches and handbags. She worked out of her office, which was at our house and traveled between all of the outer islands. She would stay up past midnight and still wake up in time to take me to school. Fifteen years ago, when I was just a baby, my mother, was diagnosed with breast cancer. For some people they would take this obstacle as the end of their life. Those people sulk and ask questions like, “Why did this happen to me?” They don’t think about the positives in their life. Ultimately, they prove that it was the end of their life. This may have been the case for some people, but not for my mom. Not once did the thought of dying even cross her mind. She was determined to take this disease head on and defeat it. Although I don’t remember this, I have heard stories about her. Everyone has told me that when they visited her in the hospital, she would always be working. She had the pile of papers laid out on the bed with her balding head from all of the kimo treatment. When she overcame breast cancer, people recognized her true character. She would always find a way to get things done. It didn’t matter if it was cooking dinner for us, or sealing the order for a major tournament, she always found a way to get the job done. Our family was happy to have gotten through this hardship and we found that living. We enjoyed our lives was enough for our family. Ten years later, for my brother’s graduation present, my parents prayed that he did not ask for a car but surprisingly my brother asked to go to Japan as a family over spring break. My mom was extremely excited because her family came from Japan many generations ago and she had heard such great things about the food, scenery, and most importantly, the shopping. The trip was going great until it took a turn for the worst. My mom got sick. She started to lose energy and have cold sweat. Being the strong willed person that she was, there was no possibility she was going to miss out on this amazing experience. She may have been sick, but she still made the same jokes and went straight for the chocolate at every shop we passed. When we got home the next week, she went to the doctor and took some tests. They found that her breast cancer had come back. It was already in the rigorous stages and the doctors told her that if they had caught it earlier, they might have been able to get rid of it. This time, I was old enough to understand what was going on and it broke my heart. My mom started the treatments immediately. At first, she didn’t want to lose her hair because for my mom and I, our hair was priceless. She finally decided it was necessary to do kimo because none of the treatments were working. She said goodbye to her hair and shaved it off with a razor. She bought a wig and told us not to tell anyone. She could not have her clients finding about the cancer because the companies would fire her. Our family kept it a secret and my mom continued to work from the day she was diagnosed to the day she passed away. She knew everyone would find out about her illness eventually but it wouldn’t be until after she had passed. Many people found it shocking yet depressing because the people that doubted her in the beginning, had nothing but good things to say about her work and her personality. She became well known in her business and she gained a lot of respect from the people she knew well as well as the people who just met her once. This experience was life changing because I knew I would have to take on a lot more responsibilities. I have always had this idea of growing up with both of my parent. I thought that they would both be there when I graduated high school, and college, as well as when I got married. Now, I felt like I didn’t have anyone on my side. I was just a blade of grass on a football field. I didn’t have anyone at night to talk to for hours. I didn’t have those wonderful home cooked meals, or that voice of reason that always helped me through tough situations. I was forced to grow up in a short period of time. A lot of things have changed in two years and I feel that I have matured beyond my years. My mom passed away in January and golf season started in March. I had to sign up for all of the tournaments I wanted to play in, make airplane reservations, and work around other people’s schedules because my father could not always take off work. I knew my mom wouldn’t want me to stop golfing because it is something that she and I loved to do. Her main goal was for me to play college golf with a golf scholarship. Last week, I committed to Pepperdine University with a golf scholarship. I have been imagining what this would feel like and now that I have accomplished it, it feels extraordinary. Through this experience, I have learned how to talk to authorities and what is acceptable and unacceptable to say on the phone or an email. I have also learned how to use my resources because I made an appointment with my college counselor and teachers to get their opinion on the situation. I was prepared for both the good news as well as the bad news and no matter which way the conversation went, I would have an answer. I think this is a very important trait for a person to have because life is not going to be perfect and you have to be ready for both the best and the worst. I wouldn’t consider myself to be fully matured woman, but I think that I am very close to becoming one. I have seen how unfair life can be, but I believe that all things happen for a reason. Now, I see the world from a completely different angle. It is probably true that many people would not consider me as a woman because I am not independent financially and I am only sixteen years old, but I have matured immensely through these trials and tribulations. I still have a lot to learn and many more experiences to go though but for my age, I consider myself to be more mature than my peers and I think that I am close to becoming a woman.