Kenneth's+Coming+of+Age+Paper

Coming of Age  In our blogs, we all proposed our idea of what it means to be a man or a woman as opposed to being a boy or a girl. While we all had many different ideas, the general consensus was that a boy or girl crosses the threshold and becomes a man or woman gradually as he or she matures both emotionally and physically. While we all focused on the mental growth involved, we also agreed that a certain amount of physical growth was key. None of us would have considered a little boy or girl to be a man or woman no matter how mature he or she was. At the same time, some of us also believed that even an adult can still be a boy or girl depending on his or her playfulness or lack of maturity. Based on our discussion, I have concluded that I have yet to transform into a man. I feel that to be a man, I would need to have the readiness to take care of myself and be independent. At the same time, I will soon have to practice my independence whether I like it or not as I leave for college. Thus, I feel that while I have not yet crossed the threshold into manhood due to my lack of the emotional maturity to be independent, I am beginning to take my first steps towards becoming one as I prepare to leave home to attend college.  Overall, the class agreed that the critical difference between a boy and a man is his maturity or lack thereof. In that sense, I do not think that I am a man. While I would like to think that I have some degree of maturity, I consider the capability to be independent to be crucial to truly being mature. I rely on my parents for nearly every aspect of my life. They provide the money for virtually everything I need, from clothes to school to a house and food. Without them, I would be homeless and completely without means to survive. While most kids my age rely on their parents for financial support, some of them could possibly find some sort of job and provide some sort of support for themselves. I, on the other hand, would probably be a mess without them. Even if I had a house to live in, without my parents, the house would probably quickly run out of food as I would not have the time to refill the refrigerator. College will be a real example of life with a house and a school, but without my parents. There, I will have to make sure I eat properly and stay healthy on my own. Currently, if I become ill my parents can easily call the school to notify them and take me to see the doctors if necessary. In college, I will be miserable on my own as no one will be there to baby me and take care of me. There, I will have to find a new means of transportation as I will no longer be able to ask my parents for rides or borrow their car for a few hours. All the simple conveniences of having parents to take care of me will suddenly disappear and I will be mostly on my own.  Once in a while, I also notice how many little details there are involved in being a full-fledged man or woman. As a man, I will have to deal with taxes, politics, a house, kids, a wife, and a job. I am dreading having to go to the same workplace every day. While I do hope that I will enjoy my future job, having to go to the same place and doing the same thing for several hours at a time seems like an enormous bore. Even working a shift at Family Fair becomes quite tedious to me and I quickly find myself wanting to go off and do something else. I find this childish restlessness of mine to be another sign that I have yet to become a man.  While I know that I have not emerged from being a boy to become a man, I also have noticed instances where I have gradually been leaving my childhood behind. In the past few years, certain events have made me feel that I have begun to leave my boyhood behind and have begun to lean toward manhood. I first felt this transformation when I received my driver’s license about a year ago. Going from having to have one of my parents right next to me every time I was in the car to being able to take one of their cars and drive myself anywhere I pleased felt like a huge step for me. At the same time, I also felt the fear of having to rely on myself. With my poor sense of direction, I have great difficulty when trying to drive on my own. I also have to be alert and watch out for other cars and pedestrians without my parents there to help me. If I were to ever be in a minor car accident, my parents would not be there to be able to calmly carry out the necessary steps to call the police and find out all the insurance information needed. I would probably freak out and panic even if the fault was not mine.  Along with receiving my driver’s license, this college application process has also reminded me that I will soon have to fend for myself. As I see my days as a high school student slowly diminish, I see my days as a college student looming ever closer. There, the amount of independence needed will be far greater than what is needed right now. As I leave for college, I will be taking a huge step in my life and I feel that is a huge step toward manhood. As I look back on my carefree days up until now, I know that truly I have been a child all these years.  As I think about what we all generally agreed upon about what constitutes being a man versus being a boy, I can conclude that I have yet to reach manhood. While I am not entirely immature, my dependence upon my parents keeps me from being truly mature. Without them, I would likely be a hopeless mess and would not know what to do. As long as I depend upon them, I feel that I will be a boy and not a man. However, I have also felt that I have been growing into a man as I slowly become less dependent upon them. With the acquisition of my driver’s license and my gradual ascent towards college, I feel that I have become more independent and will have to continue to be more independent as I will have to take more and more care of myself. As I think about what is up ahead and see that I will have to rely on myself more, I worry and fear for my future. However, perhaps overcoming this fear and taking steps towards that future are also part of becoming a man.